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  • Register:11/11/2008 8:17 AM

Date Posted:02/17/2009 1:56 AMCopy HTML


Here are some quotes that I found from Samuel Clemens. I hope that you enjoy reading them.

Adam and Eve had many advantages,
but the principal one was that they
escaped teething.
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)
Pudd'nhead Wilson

When angry, count four; when very
angry, swear.
Samuel Clemens
Pudd'nhead Wilson

There are  two times in a man's life
when he should not speculate: when
he can't afford it, and when he can.
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)

There's plenty of boys that will come
hankering and gruvvelling around when
you've got an apple, and beg the core
off you; but when they've got one, and
you beg for the core, and remind them
how you give them a core one time, they
make a mouth at you, and say thank you
'most to death, but there ain't a-going to
be no core.
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)
Tom Sawyer Abroad

This poor little one-horse town.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
The Undertaker's Story

Training is everything. The peach was
once a bitter almond; cauliflower is
nothing but cabbage with a college
Samuel L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who
has merely laid an egg cackles as if she
laid an asteroid.
Samuel L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

Warm summer sun shine kindly here;
Warm southern wind blow softly here;
Green sod above lie light, lie light--
Good night, dear heart, good night,
good night.
On the tombstone of Susy Clemens
by Mark Twain.

Hain't we got all the fools in town on
our side? And ain't that a big enough
majority in any town?
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
Huckleberry Finn

Get your facts first, and then you can
distort 'em as much as you please.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

An experienced, industrious, ambitious,
and often quite picturesque liar.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

There are times when one would like
to hang the whole human race; and
finish the farce.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
A Connecticut Yankee at King
Arthur's Court

Modesty antedates clothes and will
be resumed when clothes are no more.
Modesty died when clothes were born.
Modesty died when false modesty was
Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)

Conductor, when you receive a fare,
punch in the presence of the passenjare.
A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare,
A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare,
A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare,
Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
Punch, brothers! punch with care!
Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

It were not best that we should all
think alike; it is difference of opinion
that makes horseraces.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
Pudd'nhead Wilson

For a male person bric-a-brac hunting
is about as robust a business as making
doll clothes.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
Tramp Abroad

He is now fast rising from affluence
to poverty.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)

All you need in this life is ignorance
and confidence, and then success is sure.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain), 1887.

Tell the truth or trump--but get the trick.
S. L. Clemens (Mark Twain)
Pudd'nhead Wilson

All backgrounds within this page are the
property and copyrighted material of me
(Fiddlinsue). They are for my own
personal use, so please be so kind as to
not take them and use them yourself.
The photo of Samuel Clemens was provided
by: Captain Donald J. Sanders, site owner
and creator of



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